Blog

Who I am

Growing up

When I was a child I was ginger,

When I was so young I would linger,

Now I’ve grown up and I’ve changed much.

When I went to school I would get mad,

When I changed my mood all that seemed far,

Time has gone by and I’ve changed much.

I was shy, but never left aside,

Wasn’t wild, but would give it a try,

I would blush in every circumstance

and fight it back.

I was bright, but never realized

I could grow to become something more,

I was sure I was second best,

And not so blessed.

Today my body talks and remembers,

Today my body walks a resembles,

A plain girl with a freckled face.

Today I don’t give up I don’t tremble,

Today I work so hard to be humble,

The past is now past, I should live with that.

Today I don’t complain,

Won’t feel ashamed,

Let’s not believe in fate again.

It’s all part of this living game.

All I want is to be my own friend.

Ma. Lulu

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Thoughts

Let’s not let the world die

Emotional beings

Awaking feelings

Humble creatures

Observe life’s features.

Caring souls

Newborn foals

Earth craves healing

Land needs breathing.

Trees won’t grow

Worms won’t glow

Fields are burning

Towns are flooding.

Food became poison

Food became cáncer

Bodies aching

Families greiving.

When we cry

We ask why

When we die

We just lie.

Each day we wake up

And we are alive

Each day we wake up

We must fight

Ma.Lulu

Lifestyle, Who I am

Dear sisters,

Oh dear sisters,

Oh dear sisters, 

My mind

Is not so blind.

Oh dear sisters,

Oh dear sisters,

Your life

Is not like mine.

Oh dear sisters,

Oh dear sisters,

All flaks

I’ll fight back.

I dont want to be afraid

Of showing you my real face.

I dont want to be afraid

Explaining you my real self

I don’t want to be alone.

I don’t want to have it all.

I don’t want to be a stone.

I just want to be on my own.

I just want to be part

Of something you don’t understand.

I just want to stay aside

Of what I don’t really stand.

I know I can live my life

Not feeling bad about my style.

I know I will live my life

Remembering who I really am.

Ma. Lulu

 

 

 

Lifestyle

Living Redundantly

Wisdom & intellectual abilities,

Won’t create uncontrolled actions.

I’m far away from conscious decisions,

No contradictions or unaware sanctions

Empty souls turn landscapes grey,

Fog drowns the atmosphere in shades,

I wait for light waves to clear my sight,

I wait for deep breathes to emphasize my flight.

I’m a foolish hypocrite, I’m full or tears and fears,

I reveal myself as nothing but austere.

And I’m up & about, my states are elusive,

But again all I do stays inconclusive.

Rejection blossoms in every memory,

So I’m constantly living in this redundancy.

The rational conversation won’t prevail on time,

I’m getting tired, even if these perceptions are mine.

I’m living redundantly

Thoughts

Unfortunate mortality

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Up in the sky,

Up like the wind,

Up I can fly,

Up I’ve got no sins.

Down is where I am.

This is what I’ve become.

And down with my faith.

Down is where I must stay.

Above the cloudy cloak,

Above this chemical fog,

Above I won’t stay long,

Above there’s nothing wrong.

Better come,

Better run,

Better not succum,

Have fun.

Better jump,

Better stomp,

Better not become 

A nun…

Down is where I am.

This is what I’ve become.

Down with my faith.

Down is were I must stay.

WE ARE MORTALS.

OUR LIFE IS FINITE.

DON’T WASTE IT.

Ma. Lulu

 

Lifestyle

FASHIONABLE KNOWLEDGE

1491705_10202721913987512_1503589199_nThroughout the last few years I have found myself quarreling with people about fashion in many occasions.

Bringing up arguments gradually became I must for me, so I would make uncomfortable questions, whenever I could, just to make people understand my point of view.

In return, the only thing I would get was resentful and irritated answers pleading for an immediate change of subject.

I really couldn’t fully understand why anybody would feel so driven by it. Why would people think fashion as something to be thrilled by when it only means that everybody should be dressed up in the same boring way, buying the same boring clothes, maybe even only changing the colour?

I certainly could only think of fashion as a disgrace. A disgrace not only for me, but also for the rest of the people living in this featureless and hopeless world.  

Why spend money just to buy the same pair of shoes your neighbour has? Why buy the same dress or t-shirt your very best friend, the person with whom you go out with, bought a couple of days ago?

Why do human beings have this urge of looking exactly the same as the person who’s standing next to them? Why don’t we want to be all different, unique, challenging to get to know?

Are we afraid of being left aside, not fitting in any group, because what we wear is so not trendy?

Am I the only one that’s wrong here? Am I the only one who thinks this way? Once again?

Although all these question keep coming back every now and then, and I still can’t quite get why do we need to be so predictable and stereotyped, I’d like to think that I have finally found a way for me to be more understanding with people.

So, a couple of months ago I started to give this whole scenery a second thought.

I decided to be more considerate to those who crave for fashion. I started to look inside myself. for something that might have triggered in the past a similar feeling in me.

What I found, was knowledge. MY OWN FASHIONABLE KNOWLEDGE.

I know it may sound, at this point, a little bit beyond compare. But please, let me put this forward with a simple question.

Where do we usually buy clothes? Big shopping malls? street-shops? Clothes-fairs? Online-shops?

And were do we get knowledge from? Don’t you think that when we sign in at University we are simply buying our own future knowledge? Don’t you think short- courses are somehow selling us some piece of information? What about work-shops and online lessons?

And don’t take this the wrong way. I, could certainly make a feast out of books, lessons and classes… out of knowledge.

I, myself, wear knowledge in a mostly obsesive way. I must confess that I crave for knowledge. And I dream about it.

I know I really know nothing. I’m 100% positive I wilL never geT to know enough. But I truly don’t care. I want more, everytime. Same as with clothes.

To put this in a different way, let me enlighten you with some personal comparisons that came up recently.

For example; handbags

The Handbag stands for the brain. Ready to let all that knowledge in, all the  knowledge we did choose to buy, but maybe weren’t exactly looking for.

It sometimes carries things we didn’t even know they were there. As when we occasionally come up with an answer we didn’t know we knew.

Red dresses. I like to think of red dresses as information we have already incorporated. Infomation that has been already digested and that we are confident enough to show off.

A Neckless should be seen as information we want to share with the world. Our new discovery. Unlike the red dress, a neckless, suggests information we are still not to sure if it’s valid. Nevertheless, it has already enlightened our life.

Rings are really special for me. In my world, they represent a precious piece of information we have produced ourselves. As it is so expensive, and difficult to find, we are a bit too scared to exhibit it. It could be stolen easily and wouldn’t be ours anymore.

Last, but not least. The new and so cherished eyeglasses. Our new way of seeing life. Our new way of seeing live after we have incorporated all that glamorous, irresistable and bewitching knowledge.

Do you have any special addiction or craving to share?

Stay tunned!

Ma. Lulu

Thoughts

Writing process

As I sit down in front of my computer,

 I can only vomit.

All those uncanny feelings, that weren’t properly digested throughout the day, silently collide with my most rational thoughts.

I finally expell my soul.

I throw up written words that only make sense as they come out in defense. In defense of my own wellbeing, In defense of my own scary bleeding.

 Absolution, liberation, emancipation.

Freedom.